3/12/21

Dear Atlas,

It’s me, your Dad.

Every time I look at the date stamp on these entries, I do a quick countdown of the days we have before you arrive.

You’re coming quickly, Atlas. We’re both ready for you and excited for you to finally arrive.

For most of my life, I worried about what this time would look like when it arrived. Pregnancy, that is. I wondered what sort of environment I would be in when I heard the words “I’m pregnant,” as well as what the state of my own affairs would be when or if it finally happened.

I set some goals in my mind for what I’d need in order to have a child and feel good about it. I thought I’d need to have a certain amount of income or money in the bank. Properties, cars, multiple streams of income . . . the list grew.

Now that you’re on the way, I wonder if all of those must-haves were really just parts of myself that I needed to overcome the “need” for—not just before having a family, but also to improve myself as a human being. All of those things come and go. Love is what remains and matters.

If I could go back and tell myself one thing during all those moments I questioned, it’d be this:

“Aaron, when the moment comes for you to have a family, you will be perfectly equipped with all the tools you need for the job.

—Me

P.S. Those things are not the ones you think you need.”

P.P.S. —Dad