5/7/21

Dear Atlas,

It’s me, your Dad.

I recently paused to wonder if you’ll know me for who I am. Then, it struck me that you won’t know me for who I have been unless I share those things with you.

My Dad told me a lot of stories about his life. From playing football as a young man to graduating from The Ohio State University, he had a unique life path; since he worked as a self-employed entrepreneur for his entire adult life, I never saw my Dad work a regular job.

I followed in his footsteps, Atlas. I’ve never found a job that suited me and have chosen to live as a self-employed entrepreneur. There are a lot of ups and downs with the occupation, but the benefits far outweigh the negatives.

Ahead of your arrival, I’m especially glad to have this occupation. I know that I’ll have the freedom, flexibility, and time in my schedule to be a good Dad to you and for you.

I’ve never had a traditional life, Atlas. As far back as I can remember, I did things differently than the rest. I guess a lot of that can be attributed to my upbringing as well as my personality.

I’ve always had one eye ahead of me, never quite fully present. Ahead of being your Dad, I’ve realized that it’s okay to be in the moment. Now, especially, I cherish these moments of peace, quiet, and clarity.

In these final days until you arrive, I think a lot about what kind of example I’m going to set for you. I wonder how my actions will impact your upbringing (a lot) and what personal issues I need to work on, separate from you.

Atlas, this pregnancy has been a journey. It has been one my greatest challenges yet. I haven’t always acted as gracefully as I would like or thought things through as much as they needed to be. I did my best, Atlas. Even in moments when it didn’t feel like it.

Pregnancy is very much a solo journey for both the Mom and the Dad. She is going through her transformations, and I am also going through my own.

Those journeys are leading us both to you, Son. We have a choice to make, as your parents, of how we will continue this journey as a family. I hope your arrival sparks something new in each of us, where we can see life, each other, our future, and the present with new eyes that previously hadn’t been used.

I’m praying for a miracle, Atlas. I’m praying for the miracle of our family.

We can’t do it without you.

Love,

Dad